


Scruffy Fluffy Megstiel

by Mixedia



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Clarence - Freeform, F/M, Holy Water, Homeless Castiel, Ice Cream, Mental Anguish, Mental Breakdown, Mental Health Issues, Self Confidence Issues, demonic self harm, using food as a coping mechanism
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-08-23
Updated: 2013-11-13
Packaged: 2017-12-24 10:15:21
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,395
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/938764
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mixedia/pseuds/Mixedia
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Series of drabbles full of scruffy fluff to do with the Megstiel ship. Just random little drabbles.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Meg has taken residence in an abandoned house and fixed it up to live there. But she's having problems being a demon in a relationship with an angel. One day, Castiel tries to phone her but gets no reply. He goes to her house to find her injured and in a bad head place.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING: using food as self harm, self harm, self confidence issues and a whole lot of other mind games. Please do not read if any of these are a trigger for you.

Castiel was a little worried, Meg wasn’t answering her phone and she always did. “She’ll be showering” He told himself, “or cooking.” The whole way back to the house she had set up residence in, he was trying to convince himself it was nothing and she was fine, but there was an odd niggling at the back of his mind that said something was dreadfully wrong.

He felt a little relief when he got back to the house and found all the doors and windows in tact. But then he opened the front door and was greeted by the horrible stench of wet, burning sulphur which could only mean one thing… Holy Water.

"Meg?" He asked the room in general, hoping for an answer and for some reason when he didn’t receive one, his little-bit-of-worrying escalated to full blown panic. He ran into the kitchen, saying Meg’s name over and over, his voice getting louder and louder with each step. His hands had begun to get clammy, his mind was whirling with terrible possibilities about what could have happened. He started shaking as he entered the living room and still saw no sign of her. "Meg?" it was more of a shout than anything now, his voice wobbling with the panic in his chest.

He made his way to the staircase and took the stairs 2 and 3 at a time, using his wings to propel himself up faster. He was beginning to realise Meg wasn’t going to respond so when he got to the top, he took a deep breath to calm himself and to taste the air, trying to get a grasp of where the smell was coming from. Bedroom, he realised, striding in and sure enough, there she was on the floor at the foot of the bed, smoke still rising from her arms, hands and even her mouth. Her eyes were closed and if it wasn’t for the smell or the smoke he may have mistaken it for sleep.

He scrambled to her side, resting his hand on her cheek and, even though he knew his powers were useless against a demon, tried to heal her with them anyway. His other hand was exploring her whole body, trying to find any evidence of foul play or attack, but all he could see was the smoke.

"Meg! Meg wake up." He begged, but there was no answer. He grabbed the throw from the bed and began dabbing tentatively at her arms and hands, trying to get as much of the Holy Water off as possible without taking her skin off at the same time. Still she didn’t wake.

Castiel picked her up and carried her to the bed, gently laying her down before running to the bathroom and getting a glass of water from the tap. Pushing his hand under her neck and pulling her head up slightly, he began to feed her the water. He knew demon’s drinking Holy Water was about the equivalent of a human drinking bleach and he had to clean as much of it out of her system as possible.

As soon as her tongue was clean, she began swallowing the water although he knew it would be a while before she woke. He gave her a break while he sat on the bed next to her, cradling her body before feeding her more water and muttering soothing words to her like “Good girl,” and “Yes that’s it,” and “You’ll feel better soon.”

Finally after 10 minutes or so, she spluttered, coughing up what he assumed must be the Holy Water and so he cleaned it up with the throw as it dribbled from her mouth so it wouldn’t hurt any more of her skin. Very soon, her eyes were open and she was resting against Cas, breathing heavily and trying to open her bleary eyes.

"Clarence?" She groaned, "That you?"  
"Yes Meg, I’m here." He told her, stroking her hair back from her face and letting the Holy Water soaked throw drop to the ground. "How are you feeling?"  
"Ugh," She moaned, rubbing her hand over her face, "Like a human that’s gone 20 rounds with a truck."

Castiel pulled himself away from her and only when he was stood off the bed did he let his emotions show. Something exploded in his heart, sending boiling hot fluid through his veins. His fists clenched hard and his head began throbbing. His rage was so absolute. He lifted his hands to his hair and began to tug, trying to calm himself down, but to no avail.

"When I find them, when I know who it was, I’ll… I’ll destroy them. I’ll rip them apart cell by cell until they know nothing more, then I shall follow them into Purgatory if I have to and ensure there is nothing left of their existance."  
"Clarence, what are you talking about?" Meg asked him, laying back on the bed, blinking hard still as if to clear the sleep from her eyes.  
"The thing that did this to you, whatever it was, I’ll annihilate it." He hissed, turning to look at her. But the look on her face made him freeze, the boiling hot that had flooded his veins only a second ago suddenly dropped to below freezing, rooting him to the spot and chasing away the anger he had been overtaken with only a moment ago.

"Meg…. What?" he asked, unsure about whether he wanted to know the answer.  
"You wanna annihilate the thing that did this to me?" She drawled, her mouth pulling up into a side grin, "Well I’m right here feathers, so come annihilate me. I did this to myself."

He knew he hadn’t wanted to hear the answer. The cold in his veins got even colder if that was possible, turning every part of him into terror and worry. “Meg….” He breathed, taking his hands down and walking over to the side of the bed, kneeling down to look her at her level. “Why?”

Meg laughed once, rolling over so she was looking up at the ceiling. “Just listen to yourself… Castiel.” She said, deliberately using his name. “Think about what you just said. You said you’d annihilate the ‘THING’ that did this to me. Thing Cas, not demon. Would you have done that if it had been a human? Because I think you would, and it’s not good Cas, it’s not… well… not really.” She added, looking at him. “You’re an angel Clarence, an Angel of the Lord, and I’m a demon, created from the twisted fucked up soul of what used to be a human. We’re on opposite sides of the scale. We shouldn’t be together, I should hate you, I should be attacking you, and you should be saying you were going to finish me off, not threatening to annihilate whatever it was that caused me physical pain. We shouldn’t be together.” She took a deep shaky breath before continuing. “But I can’t stay away from you, I’m too selfish, I can’t give you up. But I’m not good enough for you.”

Her voice broke on the last word and then Castiel saw something he never thought he would see. His Meg, his demon, his carer, his thorny rose, his beauty… She began to cry. Tears slid down her face faster than he could count, flooding her face and pushing a sharp shard of emotion through his heart. He looked past her human vessel, into the eyes of the demon she really was and instead of the ugly demonic being that she was, he saw the pain, the suffering, the… sheer everything that she had been through right back to the beautiful human soul she had once been. And her loved her more than anything.

"I’m not good enough, so I thought I’d try make myself good." She continued through her sobs and tears. "I thought if I took enough Holy Water into myself then I could be something more than this worthless piece of garbage my soul has become, I could be human maybe. And it still wouldn’t be enough to be with you, but it would be a step closer and maybe I would’t feel so horrible."

Castiel grabbed hold of her hand as hard as he could which made her gasp in pain and gave him the opportunity to get a word in edgeways.

"Meg, shut up." He commanded her and her surprise caused her to follow it. "Take a look at me Meg, look at who I am. Do you really believe I give a fuck what the norm in this situation is?" He asked her, knowing his use of the expletive would make her smile, and it did a little, which gave him the confidence to continue. "Do you honestly have that little faith in me? I’m known as Castiel the rebelled for a reason Meg, this isn’t the first time I’ve done what I shouldn’t. You think we need to be more equal? You think I’m too high up for you? Fine, then I’ll have to lower myself in your estimation." He squinted at her, "So ‘fuck’ needs to enter my language far more often." He joked, which caused her to open her eyes wide.

"Holy crap Clarence, you made a funny!" She laughed, wiping the tears off her face and even when she had stopped laughing, she couldn’t stop smiling at him. He laughed and looked down in embarrassment at her gaze.

"I care about you Meg. That’s all I need to know to know what we are doing is right. Meg… I don’t want to give you up either."

After, he took off his tan overcoat and climbed onto the bed with her, wrapping his arms around her and running his toes up and down her leg. They simply laid there for the rest of the night, enjoying the warmth and comfort of the other’s solid form pressed against them.


	2. Hiding with Ice Cream

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Castiel goes to make sure Meg isn't going to attack the Winchesters any time soon, but has problems remembering why he's watching her

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING: brief mention of sex toy and it's implied that it gets used but is not described

Meg was so sick of being in hiding. Ever since Lucifer had been thrown into the cage, she had had nothing to live for, no reason to stay in existence other than the fact that she only knew how to get back to being trapped in hell and that would mean going back to being Alistair’s bitch, something she was not comfortable with.

She’d been holed up in this abandoned house for days now, not talking to anyone, not doing anything other than watching crappy daytime TV on the tiny set she had found in the living room. She was bloodlusting, would have done anything to go kill a human or two, or maybe even a demon…. especially a certain demon named Crowley. But she knew she didn’t stand a chance and needed to stay low so she wouldn’t be attacked.

So she sat and worked on changing her feelings. By about dinner time, she had warped them to think more along the lines of the seven deadly sins, because that was still pretty bad, right? But the only one she could focus on was greed, because hell was she hungry. She didn’t even need to eat, but she wanted to sink her teeth into something sugary sweet and delicious enough to make her forget who she was for a bit.

Heading into town, she stopped outside the local supermarket as her eye caught sight of the outside advertisement. A giant tub of triple deluxe chocolate ice cream for only $2? Now that was exactly what she wanted. Her mouth watering, she shoved her hands into her pockets to pull out whatever coins she could find. She had 2cents to her name. Looking down at the money, her shoulders slumped and she sighed, a sharp thrill of hatred at her life going through her. She resigned it would just be another day of pleasuring herself into the abyss and hoping it would be good enough for her to get through another day without contemplating stealing the demon blade off those Winchester brats and shoving it into her own ribcage.

Meg didn’t realise she was being watched. The supermarket carpark was too full of other beings for her to pay attention. Besides, Castiel was half using his grace to shield himself from view, so she probably wouldn’t have seen him anyway. He squinted when he saw the slump of her shoulders and felt a brief pang of pity. He was supposed to be watching Meg to make sure she wasn’t about to attack Sam and Dean, but instead he actually felt compelled to help her. He wasn’t enjoying seeing her unhappy and wanted to do something about it.

Meg knew the house had been visited almost as soon as she got back, but it was strange. The air felt clean, almost pure, angelically pure. But what would an angel be doing here? She wasn’t important enough to the angels to make them actively seek her out and attak… Well, even if they did, what did she care? Maybe apprenticing under Alistair would be fun she tried to convince herself, but not very effectively.

Walking through the door with a knife held high ready for any attack, she entered the house slowly. That’s when she saw the brown paper bag on the kitchen table. She dropped the knife and walked up to see what was in the bag.

There, before her very eyes, was the biggest tub of triple deluxe chocolate ice cream she had ever seen, a huge jar of chocolate spread, oddly enough a vibrator and a note.

_I hope this makes your existence a little more endurable_

As she read the note, a pair of the bluest of blue eyes popped up in her mind and the clean smell made her think of those incredibly sexy dark wings on Castiel.

"Clarence?" She whispered to herself, frowning in confusion. But after a moment, she decided it didn’t matter. She had the ice cream and even something to help her relax a little that night. Smiling to herself, she took the bag over to the sofa and settled in for the best night she had had in a long time.

Outside, Castiel smiled. He didn’t know why helping Meg feel better made him feel so content, it just did. With a flurry of wings, he was off back to heaven to carry on fighting his kin.


End file.
